House
Show – Southside Hall
October
2, 2016
KCWF held
its first house show in Southside Hall on Sunday, October 2. The night
was to feature 5 undercard bouts and be headlined by a special attraction match
between two of the LFF’s most popular combatants, El Super Hombre and Snake Pit!
The
night’s first match pit KCWF newcomer Gregor the Magnificent and KCWF
tournament runner-up The Right. Gregor was the first to enter the ring
followed by The Right. The match began with a flurry of strikes from The
Right. The early part of the bout was dominated by KCWF vet. He hit
his finishing strike, Piercer, which was shrugged off by the Magnificent one
with a kick out before the referee even counted one. This was followed by
The Right attempting to hoist Gregor up for The Wrack but he was unable
to. Finally, he hit his opponent with The Crucifix. Still Gregor
kicked out just before the three count could come down. The frustration
was all over The Right’s face. He blindly walked right into the Gallows
and was finished by Gregor.
After the
match the two competitors walked to the back. Screaming, yelling, and the
crack of a whip were heard coming from the locker room. This intrepid
reporter went back to find The Right whipping himself miraculously. He
saw me, I ran out as fast as I could.
The next
match was supposed to be a women’s match between Llama Natsu and La
Muñeca. As the wrestlers came down to the ring they were interrupted by
Moonshine with a mic from the entrance ramp.
“This
match was supposed to find the next challenger for the KCWF Women’s
Championship.” The crowd on hand went wild for the declaration.
“…but that’s not gonna happen. You see I won this belt by destroying my
competition at Genesis. You both had your shot. But I didn’t get
mine! They gave the “top tile” to that bag-man, whatever his name
is. I deserve that title! No one in this federation has the ability
to beat me! So, I couldn’t care less if you wastes-of-space have a match
or not. You just won’t be facing me for my title. Tonight, I’ll be
wrestling that bag of a wrestler the KCWF calls there champion!”
With that
Moonshine threw down the mic and the gauntlet. Natsu and Muñeca shrugged
to each other and headed to the back.
The Next
match featured Korr the Konqueror vs Jorge “JFK” Kennady. The Politian
took the initiative of trying to look-up with the man mountain. Korr was
having none of it as he threw “JFK” to the floor. Jorge jump quickly to
his feet brushing himself of trying to pretend he hadn’t just tasted the
canvas. The two traded blows and holds for a time until the Konqueror had
enough of Kennady. He hit his competitor with his patented Decap Attack
and that was all she wrote.
Before
the fourth match could begin we heard from ??? about Moonshine’s
comments. Well, we didn’t hear from him exactly, he just stood
there… with a bag on his head. “Well… Moonshine?” the interviewer said.
??? faced the crowd as if to get their feeling. They roared in
approval and the Mystery man ended the interview with an emphatic hand raise,
as if to say “they want it, they get it”.
The next
match was supposed to be for the new number one contender for the title held by
???. Dr. Skullface was taking on Draco. The two squared off I guess
to see who would take on the winner of ??? and Moonshine. What a match
they had! The two men laid it all on the line. The Doctor was
trying every trick in the book. Draco was flying all around the
ring. Skullface threw out the Trocar Trap. Kick out. Draco
tried the Leatherback-Out. Kick out. Skullface tried to perform
Exploratory Surgery. Draco tried the Snap Jaw Squeeze. Finally, Dr.
Skullface had Draco all lined up for the Amputap-out but Draco countered
flawlessly to the Scale Slam. 1, 2, 3!
Prince
McSham took the microphone to a chorus of boos.
“I’m here
to announce a change to tonight’s main event. Super El Hombre and Snake
Pit have both said they refuse to wrestle for an organization that would allow
a female wrestler to challenge for the title. I assured them the match
between ??? and Moonshine would not be happening tonight or ever.
(Boos!) They still said they wouldn’t perform for such a crowd as
this. To that I said, “ well, don’t let the door hit ya!” Now the
KCWF presents to you, for the first time ever, the unification of our top belts
into the Kalamazoo Card Wrestling Federation World Championship!”
The crowd
went absolutely wild. The stage is set for our two belts, our two
champions to fight to become the KCWF World Champion!!!
Standing
in the center of the ring the mysterious ??? was motionless, head cocked,
staring at the eterance ramp as Moonshine charged and dived into the ring. Before the bell could even ring the match
began! Moonshine jumped up and unleashed
a savage forearm strike to her opponent’s head, followed by a crushing kick to
the mid-section. Nearly collapsing, ???
managed to stand to his feet only to be thrown upside down and into the
punishing Moonshiner! A pin! But a quick kick out from the heroic bagman
who rolled away from the hulking bootlegger.
“Looks
like you outta be in the damn Women’s Division with moves like those!!” taunted
Moonshine.
With a
questioning look ??? charged forward and locked up with her only to be quickly
humiliated by Moonshine’s reversal into the crushing strike of Hit the
Handle. Nearly unconscious, ??? lay flat
on his back for 1… 2… before weakly lifting his shoulder off the mat.
“Stay
down would ya! I got some drinkin’ to
do!!” Moonshine hollered while delivering a brutal kick to the bagged head of
???.
Rolling out
of the ring to escape his opponent, ??? seemed oblivious to his surroundings. Stumbling to his feet, ??? staggered towards
the crowd before collapsing over th barrier and onto the crowd.
“Hold
up! You already got a taste of my
shine?!” roared Moonshine as she looked around frantically for her precious
shine bottle and downing nearly half of the potent potion before her.
Meanwhile,
the referee began counting. Fans roared
in support, working to stand up, the injured and barely conscious ??? pushed
towards the ring. 8… 9… With
one last effort, ??? lunged for the ropes ringside but stumbled and crashed
face first into the ring post instead. 10!! Count out!!
And without even realizing she had just won the match, Moonshine tossed
her empty jug straight at the bagged head of ??? Moonshine picked up her second belt and stumbled
out of the ring and into the back muttering.
“… gots
to find me a real match… none of these city boys got enough to take on me”
The final
match had turned KCWF on its head. Two
titles held by one superstar?
